I've written a few posts about my feelings and thoughts about friendships (past & present) recently and they have been scheduled to appear automatically by themselves on the blog throughout the month. I got inspired to write all those because of what I've seen myself happening among people whom I know personally and also myself.
But yesterday morning (around 3 am), I felt that the posts are of no meaning at all. And I deleted all of them.
Why I say that?
While chatting with Ms. Lam in the wee hours of the morning, I suddenly noticed how worthless one's feeling can be in the eyes of others.
Important or Worthless is totally dependent of the receiver and not the sender. I've seen how others ignored my feelings totally when doing something which hurts me. I've seen the same happening to my friends.
I just don't understand what's wrong with the world. I do understand that somehow, inside every single one of us, there is always a little selfishness which urges us to satisfy what we want/need/desire. I've always tried my best to balance what I want and what I give to the ones I care for, even then, I still admit I can't do that very well, sometimes I expect more from others while I can't give as much, but I try to avoid that as much as possible.
But sometimes as what Ms. Lam told me, people just assume that whatever we do is what we are expected to do for them, somehow, to others, what we do are an obligation (as in we are expected to give all those to them). But they totally forget to take into consideration of what we need, while we are trying to satisfy their desire.
Ms. Lam and I agree that if they are people whom we care of, obviously, we need to try our best to provide our best for them. But then, at the same time, it is hurtful when they take these for granted. Don't you think so? I guess, all we want is for others to recognise/acknowledge what we did for them. But not as in saying it out loud, but through little gesture of care and love. But in such a realistic and hectic world, care and love can be rather hard to provide right?!
But yesterday morning (around 3 am), I felt that the posts are of no meaning at all. And I deleted all of them.
Why I say that?
While chatting with Ms. Lam in the wee hours of the morning, I suddenly noticed how worthless one's feeling can be in the eyes of others.
Important or Worthless is totally dependent of the receiver and not the sender. I've seen how others ignored my feelings totally when doing something which hurts me. I've seen the same happening to my friends.
I just don't understand what's wrong with the world. I do understand that somehow, inside every single one of us, there is always a little selfishness which urges us to satisfy what we want/need/desire. I've always tried my best to balance what I want and what I give to the ones I care for, even then, I still admit I can't do that very well, sometimes I expect more from others while I can't give as much, but I try to avoid that as much as possible.
But sometimes as what Ms. Lam told me, people just assume that whatever we do is what we are expected to do for them, somehow, to others, what we do are an obligation (as in we are expected to give all those to them). But they totally forget to take into consideration of what we need, while we are trying to satisfy their desire.
Ms. Lam and I agree that if they are people whom we care of, obviously, we need to try our best to provide our best for them. But then, at the same time, it is hurtful when they take these for granted. Don't you think so? I guess, all we want is for others to recognise/acknowledge what we did for them. But not as in saying it out loud, but through little gesture of care and love. But in such a realistic and hectic world, care and love can be rather hard to provide right?!
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